


Windborne Feathers

by mathmusicreading



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: F/M, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-30
Updated: 2014-07-30
Packaged: 2018-02-11 01:55:20
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 12
Words: 2,763
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2048916
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mathmusicreading/pseuds/mathmusicreading
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Rivetra Week 2014 - prose and poetry; art and audio can be found at <a href="http://mathmusicreading.tumblr.com/tagged/rivetra-week/chrono">mathmusicreading.tumblr.com/tagged/rivetra-week/chrono</a>, including a voice-acting commission for chapter 12!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Day 1 - Survive

Levi has never slept well, but it’s better with Petra. She is peace and comfort, and she brings him a contentment he has never known.

And the nights when he still can’t sleep, she is with him. For them, the small hours of the night are filled not with sweet nothings, but their devotion to each other.

"If we survive …"

They murmur their dreams, promises to each other.

"A wedding under the sky."

"A small house to call home."

"Sunday dinners with your father, and spoiled children with unending laughter to disturb the peace."

He marvels at how in tune with him and loving she is, never leaving him alone in the darkness and the silence. He wonders if she will ever let him stay up alone and gaze at her until exhaustion finally claims him, or if the quiet times will always be ones of happiness with the soothing sound of her voice, the joining of hands, and the stroking of hair. He watches her, trying to find the dreams that will elicit a smile or soft laughter, so he knows she is never the first to drift into sleep.

Their happiness is still a secret they cannot share with the world, but they will get each other through the war, so he begins to allow “if” to give way to “when the war is over” in his thoughts.

But she doesn’t survive. And really, neither does he.


	2. Day 2 - Fate (Alternative)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Based on ["A Thousand Years"](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q9ayN39xmsI) by Christina Perri.

Green. Orange. Red. The world is a chaotic blur of bright colors that he can’t make out, and behind the pounding of his heart in his ears there is only silence.

With all the obstacles before them—the titans, the fact that she is his subordinate, his past—he has been afraid to love her. And it’s not just about caring and being vulnerable; it’s that he’s so broken and she is herself. Petra, who is so fierce in her capability and confidence and beliefs and goodness, Petra certainly doesn’t need  _him_ , so he can’t understand how she can  _want_  him.

Evidently the universe agrees that he doesn’t deserve her and so has rectified the matter.

Except this  _isn’t_  right. Petra can’t be dead with so many of her dreams unfulfilled, and he was  _wrong_  to love her in fear and doubt instead of unreservedly.

It becomes Levi’s mission to see Petra’s dreams fulfilled, and he takes to his grave the images of her he can never forget—her body crushed against the tree and abandoned to the titans—and his indelible love for her.  
  


Lyle isn’t the least bit romantic, but he feels more dead than alive until the day he meets her and he just  _knows_  that he’s been searching for her across lifetimes and waiting for this day. Her friends inform him that Rachel doesn’t jump into relationships, but they take pity on him and also tell him that she’s enthusiastic about making friends. Lyle’s own friends find the situation hilarious as “he’s wearing his heart on his sleeve and the only reason Rachel doesn’t know how he feels is because he’s emotionally constipated and fails at communication”. They congratulate him when he finally manages to ask her out, but return to ribbing him about being romantically clumsy when Rachel pulls the brakes after Lyle accidentally tells her he loves her on their second date.

Lyle is simply grateful she wasn’t frightened away: she thinks he’s brave and feels they might have something special, but she wants to take things slowly and really get to know him. For the woman who absolutely floors him with how beautiful a person she is, he gives years.

When he kneels before her with a ring in his hand, time stops and he can’t breathe, but she flings herself at him and her embrace sets the world spinning again. The wedding isn’t the biggest day of his life but of lifetimes. He is so blessed because she loves him and life has led him here, and in his vows he speaks of love and devotion for her to span all time.


	3. Day 3 - Demons

The cat is a  _demon_.

Not black as night with glowing yellow eyes, true, but if a stub for a tail and heterochromatic eyes don’t scream “demon” then Petra doesn’t know what does. And screw ironically naming a predominantly-white calico cat “spotted” in a proto-language; that’s just pretentious and  _everyone_  knows Kerberos is a  _hellhound_. The cat’s coat is also a  _van pattern_ , making him look much more like he has three heads than spots.

It’s  _not_  pretentious and his elegant feline companion is  _nothing_  like a scruffy canine, Levi hisses, because “everyone” knows  _Cerberus_  is the guardian of the underworld. Kerberos is well-behaved and quiet, and rodents aren’t a problem.

Petra doesn’t dispute that the cat is well-behaved, but the one time she slept over  _he crawled up on her chest like some kind of incubus_. She’s not buying Levi’s assertions that he’s friendly because it’s creepy how alertly he watches her and having a soft voice isn’t the same thing as being quiet _—has Levi heard the unnatural range of sounds that cat can make?_

  
During their honeymoon in Paris Levi complains that pigeons are the real demons: they’re pestiferous, their excrement is everywhere, and their beady red eyes just scream pure evil. Petra tells him he shouldn’t eat his breakfast croissant on their hotel room balcony if he doesn’t want to be mobbed.

She lets Levi keep Kerberos and warms to him though. She just insists they close the bedroom door at night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kerberos is a [Japanese Bobtail](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Japanese_Bobtail).


	4. Day 4 - Heaven and Hell

Levi knows, if there’s any justice after death then he certainly doesn’t deserve heaven.

But Petra will most certainly be there, and he thinks if there’s any justice after death then he’ll be with her again.

The goddesses must have worked out the paradox, because  _there she is and he’s running so hard and as fast as he can to get to her he can’t breathe and his heart is pounding in his chest and his whole body is on fire—_  
  


_"Levi!"_

When Levi opens his eyes and sees Erwin’s and Hanji’s concerned faces, he knows he’s in hell.


	5. Day 4 - Dream (Alternative)

The children are asleep in their rooms and Petra’s hand is in his as they stay up just a little longer, savoring the peace and quiet. Petra gets up to make some tea, and Levi marvels at how his life can be so perfect.

The knock at the door is unusual so late at night, and Levi can’t shake the disquiet that comes over him like an all-encompassing fog. The feeling only grows when he sees the two figures at the door.

The visitors step inside and Levi backs back onto the couch. He feels dizzy, the world shakes and the walls around him fade for a moment as he sits back down. He can’t hear Petra in the kitchen; when is she coming back?

His unwelcome guests share a look between them. Levi doesn’t like what he sees there. They begin to speak in gentle voices that echo in his head, resonating and jarring. What they’re saying is absurd and wrong and Levi’s shaking his head. Their tones become more insistent and Levi is aghast at how rude their questions are.

No, he doesn’t feel like he’s too old for his wife and Petra isn’t too young for their children and they’re going to wake them  _and where is Petra?_

But now Hanji and Erwin _—wheredidthosenamescomefrom_ —are asking where Petra is and the weight of his anxiety is so oppressive, Levi can’t move to find or call her and the world has shrunk to this small space. Now they’re telling him—no, no, they can’t, how dare they, he’s clutching his head because it hurts so much—

Levi doesn’t know how they wrestled his arms away but they’ve pulled them down by his sides as they kneel in front of him.  _There’s, there’s something wrong with his jacket_ _._  Hanji’s face is right in front of his own and he can’t escape her eyes and her quiet, firm words.

"Come back to reality, Levi. Please"

Erwin brings out a blade.

Levi bows his head.  
  


He wakes up crying. He’s lost his dreams. He’s an old man filled with regret, waiting to die alone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> References to [_Inception_ (2010)](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Inception) and ["Call Your Name"](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oDJsWZ4WIuQ) by MPI and CASG, from the Shingeki no Kyojin Original Soundtrack composed and arranged by Hiroyuki Sawano.


	6. Day 5 - AU

When she brings his coffee, he thinks Sunshine would be a good nickname for her, because her smile and her hair and her personality are just so sunny.

He comes back everyday and hangs back until he can get her, makes the same order, and lingers near the counter to wait for it instead of going to sit. He takes note from her name tag that her name is Petra, and he wonders if she considers him a regular now, and knows from his receipts that his name is Levi. He thinks he shouldn’t take a moment to sip his drink and then leave just so he has an excuse to stay near her for a second, or stay to drink it just so when he looks around he can see her, but it doesn’t mean anything.

He’s late today and sits down tiredly with his cup. Petra joins him with a cup of her own and he can only stare in shock as she smiles at him.

"I’m on break, here," she passes him her cup. "You never actually order coffee; this is a Passiona cafe au lait so it should have the same low-caffeine content as the black tea in your chai tea latte."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not a fan of coffee or Coffee Shop AU's, so I thought this would be funny for Levi's preference for tea vs. coffee. Then the black tea worked out perfectly, so yay!


	7. Day 5 - Touch (Alternative)

This gift, has to be special. Because  _she_  is so special, and it’s not just for their anniversary, it’s for her to remember him by while he’s overseas. He wants it to be perfect, perfect for her.

Petra. It’s just a syllable, but he likes to call her Pet instead of by her full name. It’s an expression of how special she is, showing their closeness and what she means to him, a declaration that she is the world each time it falls from his mouth.

He considers jewelry, but there’s no heart or intent to it, it’s so impersonal, and a cold, hard rock isn’t what he wants her to have to remember him. That gets him thinking though. Precious stones. Everyone knows the meaning of the name Petra is stone or rock, but—

This is it, it’s perfect. In the light the magpie has beautiful blue and white wings and he thinks its songs will make her smile. He’s delightfully intelligent and will be Petra’s companion with Levi gone, another small heart to love her and for her to love.

He brings him home and tells Petra he’s found her wings, and explains that he’s found another meaning to her name that few are aware of. He says she’ll have her own Pet to rush and fly happily about; and when she smiles when she reaches out to gently touch his feathers, he knows he’s touched her heart.

She declares she’ll call him Little Levi, because he’s a symbol of their joining, their pledging, their being attached. She nudges Levi playfully; she knows the meanings of names too, and it  _is_  their anniversary.

Little Levi’s songs aren’t pretty but they make Petra smile and she thinks he’s just like her husband. After she opens the door to find three military personnel on her doorstep, is told Levi is dead and they regret to inform her they could not recover his body or his effects, she stays strong. When she cares for her Pet, she touches the beautiful feathers, the brilliant blue and white wings he gave her, every day and she knows she has proof that he was alive. To her, at least.

She has her little love to comfort her in her sorrow with Levi gone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Etymological references for [Petra/Pet](http://www.etymonline.com/index.php?term=feather&allowed_in_frame=0) and [Levi](http://www.etymonline.com/index.php?term=Levi&allowed_in_frame=0).
> 
> [Extra meaning behind Little Levi.](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eurasian_magpie#Traditions)


	8. Day 6 - Supposed to be Enemies

"Levi!"

Petra scolded him from where she stood in the middle of the room. “You can’t guess when it’s not your team’s turn; we’re supposed to be enemies!”

"It’s just Levi’s impatience and perfectionism," Hanji laughed, "he can’t stand other people guessing and not calling out his answer."

"Time," reminded Nanaba, returning their focus to Petra’s Pictionary offering.

More shapes appeared on the drawing pad as Petra attempted to reign in Hanji’s guesses and spur on Nanaba’s. Levi began to open his mouth but Erwin slapped a hand over it, other hand heavy on Levi’s shoulder. Levi glared at Erwin but subsided, settling back into the couch sullenly.

"Come on, Levi," Mike said without looking away from the timer, "since you can’t draw to save your life, the least you can do is to control yourself and not help the enemy."

Erwin relaxed his hand. “We need to make the smart moves. We underestimated the difficulty of game rules. Levi, you don’t want us to have to change Game Night—”

"Lifestyle!"

"That’s it!"

"Wahoo!"

"LEVI!"


	9. Day 6 - Horror Story (Alternative)

_Rustle._

_Thump._

_Thump._

_Thump._

Levi began to put away the groceries while Eren continued to unload the car. Petra appeared at the sound of their activity and started tying bags into sticks, ready for a lighter activity and the conversation of her husband and son after moving boxes all morning.

Levi took his wife’s arrival as invitation to recount the trials of their expedition.

"Getting groceries was fine, but on the way back we passed some kind of outlet mall and Eren had me drive through the parking lot since Armin’s birthday is coming up. I wasn’t looking at the stores since we were getting turned around and I had to watch the GPS, and then Eren wanted me turn back because we’d passed Barnes & Noble. I turned the car around and I was scanning low because we were too close to the stores and their names were too high up so what was the point since I was sitting on the left side of the car; I needed to find a parking spot and I could recognize the storefront. Except then Eren said I was passing it again! So I parked and we got out and we were walking up to the store and it was  _disgusting_.

The windows had giant, protruding window sills and instead of large, single sheets of glass for the windows they were smaller with with  _lattices_  for panes so you couldn’t see inside. They couldn’t have the nice big posters, and the windows did show nice displays or reading nooks or the  _faces_  of bookshelves. And along with being chunky the color scheme was off  _and the store name_. And it had these big-ass, nearly black  _awnings_ , it looked like  _Starbucks_.”

Petra elbowed her husband and Eren chortled.

Levi continued on, unapologetic.

"We didn’t move somewhere civilized when we moved to the suburbs,  _we moved somewhere that thinks it’s hip and modern_.”

Petra threw her head back and laughed but kissed him sympathetically on the cheek.

"How horrifying."


	10. Day 7 - Equals/Companions

They could not walk  
side by side,  
if they were not equals,  
together to abide.

And be companions  
until the end,  
each other's champions,  
but foremost, friends.


	11. Day 7 - Lies (Alternative)

Your eyes, your eyes  
are full of lies.  
And I can see  
deep inside.

When will you  
stop running  
from yourself?

Oh let me in.  
Please, I want to help.


	12. +1 - NSFW

| _Re:  
_ | _Date: July 20, 2014  
_ | _From: comeinsidethewall@wallmail.com  
_ | _To: petralocity@wallmail.com  
_ | _  
_| _I found the perfect poem for Levi!  
_ | _Make him read it to you the next time  
_ | _you have a domestic. ;D  
_ | _  
_| _[attachment]_

Curious, Petra good-naturedly clicked Hanji’s attachment—and immediately began reading it in her husband’s voice upon laughing at the opening.

_How you must have suffered getting accustomed to me,_   
_my savage, solitary soul, my name that sends them all running._   
_So many times we have seen the morning star burn, kissing our eyes,_   
_and over our heads the gray light unwind in turning fans._

_My words rained over you, stroking you._   
_A long time I have loved the sunned mother-of-pearl of your body._   
_I go so far as to think that you own the universe._   
_I will bring you happy flowers from the mountains, bluebells,_   
_dark hazels, and rustic baskets of kisses._

_I want to do with you  
what spring does with the cherry trees._

"What are you doing?" Levi’s voice, real and outside her head, abruptly interrupted her.

"Oh, nothing," Petra replied calmly, beginning to type a reply, "just e-mailing Hanji."

| _Re: Re:  
_ | _Date: July 20, 2014  
_ | _From: petralocity@wallmail.com  
_ | _To: comeinsidethewall@wallmail.com  
_ | _  
_| _Dear Hanji,  
_ | _  
_| _Thanks, but as we’ve already told you,  
_ | _we are not planning to have a child  
_ | _any time soon or make you a godparent.  
_ | _I’ll pass on the poem to Levi though.  
_ | _  
_| _ <3_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Excerpt from [“Every Day You Play”](http://albalearning.com/audiolibros/neruda/poema14-sp-en.html) by Pablo Neruda.


End file.
